What do you think of my story so far?

Well the person above me was kind of mean so I'll take what they said and put it into a nicer perspecive. It does sound like it was written by a 12 year old and I actually I was 12 and wrote muchhhhhh better than this. I'm not an expert on grammar but this is terrible. You don't put a period before a question mark like ".?" I couldn't read all of it because it was kind of bad. Start of a a paragraph each time you switch speakers. And go to www.writing-world.com and go to the beginners section to get more tips.